Today’s thankful: My treadmill

Today was the first day of week three of the Couch to 5K program. I realized during the first few minutes of week one that I really hate it when my shorts ride up between my chubby thighs and get stuck there. It took me until today to figure out a fix for the problem. I didn’t wear shorts to run. I wouldn’t recommend running without shorts at the gym or out in the neighborhood, but it was great in the privacy of my own bedroom.

Today’s thankful: I woke up in the middle of the night and washed Tiny Person’s hair

I have had a rule in place for the past dozen or so years that there are only a few reasons to wake mommy. If one is bleeding, vomiting or otherwise in physical distress, they may wake me. I know this rule sounds harsh, but both Eldest and Middlest inherited their dad’s insomnia. They were fond, as little girls, to wake me to let me know they couldn’t sleep. I am a good sleeper, hence the rule. Over the years, they have awoken me on numerous occasions, all valid. So about a month ago, Eldest woke me up to let me know there was something that resembled paint in Youngest’s hair. When I didn’t respond with much more than a sleepy grunt, Eldest became more adamant that I get up. She has always been great at following the don’t wake mommy rule, so I paid attention to her second attempt. I am SO glad I did. I went into the bathroom to find Youngest with something that looked like lumpy paint with sparkles and some sort of grease in her hair. I tossed her into the tub and washed whatever it was out of her hair. She refused to say what the substance was for about four days. The incessant nagging by her sister finally forced the information out of her. She had mixed old nail polish, powder blush and hand lotion. I have no idea where she got the nail polish, but she has been banned from paint of any kind for a while.

Today’s thankful: It wasn’t an angry bird

I noticed my dryer has been taking two cycles to dry the clothes, which means the vent in the side of the house needs to be cleaned out. I went to the side of the house, stepped up on my air conditioning unit, and reached up to pluck what I expected to be wet lint from my vent. What happened instead is that a bird had built its nest in my vent and it was a BIRD that came flying out of my vent when I stuck my hand in there. I am very thankful that I didn’t fall off the air conditioner when it shot out, as it scared the snot out of me. More than that, though, I am extremely glad it wasn’t an angry, attack bird.

Today’s thankful: It was a substitute teacher

At the dinner table this evening, Youngest informed us that they had a substitute teacher today. During the spelling portion of the day, the students were to make up sentences using their spelling words. Then they were going over them in class. Youngest said, “I got to read my sentence with the word found. I wrote, ‘I found some poop.’ The whole class laughed. I didn’t get to do any more sentences.”

Today’s thankful: Back to school

Tiny person was home with me for nine straight days over spring break. ‘Nuf said?

Today’s thankful: I learned to dole out truth slowly

A few months ago, Youngest asked about the tooth fairy. Since she is getting close to seven years old, I decided to tell her the truth. She took the news very well. I toyed with telling her everything, but after my experience with Eldest, decided to let her ask about each magical being on her own. With Eldest, I thought it would be less painful to just get all the bad news over at once, so when she asked about the Easter Bunny, I told her about all of them. She yelled, “I only asked you about the Easter Bunny!”
So not terribly long ago I started taking Youngest’s innocence with the tooth fairy. Yesterday she asked me about Santa. I told her the truth, including the part about him being a symbol of the magic of giving to others. She took the news like a trooper, then went to her room and sobbed. She wouldn’t let me in for a while. It broke my heart. When she finally let me in, I assured her that nothing would change, since it had been me all along. That information lessened the sting a bit, thankfully.
About an hour after the Santa incident, Youngest came to me and said, “The Easter Bunny is real.” I asked if she was telling me or asking me. She said, “telling.” I asked why she thought he was real, and she informed me that the bunny brings jelly beans. I said, “Don’t they sell jelly beans in the store?” She informed me, with a DUH! sound in her voice, that the store is where he gets the jelly beans. I guess a girl can only handle so much truth at a time.

Today’s thankful: I don’t need to take a class -- again

Youngest was less than pleased with the food I presented to her highness for lunch. After the food battle over six bites of broccoli and homemade mac and cheese ensued. About an hour after she finished her last bite, she asked me if there was a class you could take to make sure you don’t kill anyone with your cooking. Well, there kind of is, but I have already taken and passed it. Instead of admitting to her that there is such a class, I opted instead to remind her that I haven’t managed to kill her with my cooking yet and don’t plan to start now.