Today’s thankful: She didn’t mention chopping

Youngest always says that I am the one making her late for school in the morning, even though she is the one lying in bed not getting dressed. Her dad thinks it is pretty entertaining. A few days ago he asked her if mommy was making her late again. She responded in the affirmative. He then asked her what they should do with me. She said, “We could throw her in a dumpster.” He, of course, quashed that idea. I found myself not being upset about the dumpster, but really, really thankful that she didn’t suggest chopping me up before putting me in the dumpster.

Today's thankful: I'm pretty sure the kids are wrong

I won't lie. My brain has been wonky for the past three or four weeks. Of course, that period of time covers Christmas, an upper respiratory thing, sleep deprivation and returning from vacation to the work routine. My big girls keep suggesting the possibility that I have had a stroke and it did heavy damage to my brain. I am pretty sure they are wrong.

Today’s thankful: I survived chaperoning band kids for a week

I got back last week from a trip to California where I chaperoned band kids. We had an awesome week. There were many thankfuls, some bigger than others. Our itinerary was packed, and the time allotted for sleeping was usually under four hours. My thankfuls for the week, in no particular order:
We returned with the same number of children with which we left.
We didn’t lose any of the kids when the tour guide ditched us gave us free time in Los Angeles.
None of the children were caught in flagrante delicto.
There was breakfast meat most of the days.
Most of the puking was due to air sickness, anxiety or dehydration instead of a virus or booze.
Everyone seemed to have a great time.
Everywhere we went, adults commented on how well behaved and polite our kids were.
I got to share the teacup ride with my baby girl.
My roomies were awesome and didn’t smother me in my sleep for snoring.
Each and every one of the kids marched in full uniform in the parade. This means we managed to get 275 uniforms across the country without losing a shoe or glove.
All of the children who started the parade made it the full five miles in the heat.
Neither the sugar in the bed incident nor the toilet papering the room, nor the late night pizza delivery were my problems to deal with.

Today's thankful: Nyquil naps

Everyone in our house has been sick over the holiday. Eldest, Youngest and I dropped Christmas afternoon. It has been a rough few days. The one thing that has kept me alive, I believe, is Nyquil. Just when you get to feeling so horrible that ending it all would make you feel better, you can do a shot of Nyquil, do a full body shudder, and wash it down with some water. After about 15 minutes, your body will go all tingly and it is time for the Nyquil nap. There isn't any kind of sleep like being knocked unconscious by Nyquil. Upon waking from a Nyquil nap, I no longer wish for the sweet release of death. Yep. Nyquil is some good stuff.

Today's thankful: The day off work

I had to take an impromptu day off work today because I am such a whiz at this mom thing. You would think that after 19.5 years of doing it, I would be better. Alas, 40 was probably too old to have a baby and my mind ain't what she used to be. It didn't occur to me that Youngest had the day off of school, so I didn't take vacation time to care for her. I didn't want to make Eldest care for the tiny person because she will be in charge all next week while I am in Cali. Middlest had band practice most of today in preparation for the trip. So my boss graciously let me have another day away from the office to tend to my offspring.

Today’s thankful: The possibility remains that she wasn’t serious

Last night as I was trying to get Youngest to go to bed, I noticed something yellow-green and slimy in her mouth. I said, “Is that snot in your mouth?” She told me that it wasn’t snot, but was something she coughed up. I informed her that it was still mucous and somewhat disgusting. Obviously unwilling to give up her prize, she said, “But I like the way it tastes.” I am choosing to hope she was just trying to gross me out and doesn’t really enjoy the taste of her snot.

Today’s thankful: I am not “the elderly” yet

In the car this afternoon, I heard Youngest open the bag of Twizzlers we had purchased that she decided to keep in the car for emergency snacks. I asked her if I could have one. She handed one over, then said, “It is a good thing you aren’t elderly. The elderly aren’t allowed to have candy or chocolate.” I sure hope that rule changes before I get elderly.